1. God is close to the brokenhearted.
"The Lord is near to the brokenhearted and saves the crushed in spirit." (Psalm 34:18 ESV) This verse has been my mantra of late. But it really is true, and when I look back on my life, the times when I was especially broken are often the sweetest times for me spiritually. I wish it wasn't that way. I wish that the good times were as pivotal and growth inducing as the bad times.
2. Perseverance is the stuff great mommies are made of. Motherhood is no joke. It's wonderful, amazing and everything I'd ever dreamed it would be. But it is also the hardest job I've ever had. And I am thankful for all the years I longed to be a mom and had to keep getting back up after infertility knocked me down, because I know it has made me a better mother. And I'm not saying that you have to experience infertility to he a good mom, I'm just saying that for ME personally, it has made me a better mommy.
3. Dreams can change. And plans can change. Our journey has felt very "windy". We first went to ARTs, then looked into domestic infant adoption, then took all the foster/adopt classes for adopting thru our county, only to turn around and do IVF. And our story isn't over yet. We may be a family of three when the dust settles (and that is definitely a lot different than I originally pictured things) or we could still fost/adopt or pursue embryo adoption or even do another round of IVF. The truth is I really don't know at this point and that's ok. These are decisions that everyone has to make as an individual couple, based on their family and what they feel that God is leading THEM to do. There is no set right and wrong in this. Which is what makes it both tricky and beautiful. Tricky, because it's hard to know WHAT to do, and beautiful because it's so sweet to see the unique ways God builds families.
4. Everyone's journey is unique to them. Just as grief is different for each individual, so is infertility. The way we each process infertility can vary greatly. I actually think that there are a lot of similarities, but maybe the "stages" end up in different orders.
5. God does not waste the hurt. He uses the difficult situations in our lives to grow us and make us more like HIM. I believe he also uses our trials and circumstances to prepare us for things later on. I'm not saying that I will face something worse than IF later (although that is entirely possible), I'm just saying that I believe God uses everything in our lives to shape us into the person He wants us to be. And our struggles give us the opportunity to reach out and minister to others in similar situations. I find SO much comfort and healing in being able to reach out to others and encourage/pray for them. It blows my mind when I can look back and think of the dear friends I never would have met if it weren't for my infertility journey.
6. God does give us the desires of our heart. Sometimes the desire just needs a little (or a lot) of refining and/or redefining. It's a prayer that I am learning to pray... Lord, this is where I'm at today, my heart is longing for another baby, but it is also longing for You to give me a desire for what You have for me. Open my eyes and heart to see my life through Your eyes. Give me a heart that longs for the things that You would have for me.
7. What happens to us changes us, but it doesn't have to define us. I think I have the tendency to forget that I am first and foremost a child of God. A follower of Christ. That is the only thing that needs to define me. Everything else in life that happens to me is a part of my story, but it's not "who I am".
That is my list so far. I'm sure that there will be more I can add over the coming years.
What are some of the things that infertility has taught you?
Blessings,
Amy
No comments:
Post a Comment